Spencemo for Hire: The Bitch is Back!

NOTE: This website is neither endorsed or sponsored by IUE-CWA Local 717. And, since I took the buyout, I guess neither am I!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Add One More Vulture Overhead...

Yes, I am well-aware that I have not posted anything in two months. I've even had one person threaten to take this page out of their favorites (Mike!). Well, something to write about landed in my mailbox today, so I'm baaaaaaack!

I received the following letter today from what appears to be your average, run-of-the-mill Ambulance Chaser, Stephen P. Goske, attorney at law. And he writes (with my commentary, of course)...

Dear Union Member (well, not anymore...):

This letter is an advertisement. Local 717 is not recommending either this law firm or any other (that's good to know). The Local mailed this letter at my expense (great, now I'm getting junk mail from the hall). I have not been given access to the Local's membership or mailing lists (I would certainly hope the hell not!). You are probably aware that the Union is no longer providing assistance with your workers' compensation claims and no longer has a workers' compensation representative (First, do I have a claim that I'm not aware of? Secondly, no, I wasn't aware, but thanks for telling me before I went there to get the claim I didn't know I had handled). To my knowledge, I have had no prior contact with you (Uh, you didn't check before you had the hall send me junk mail?). If I am wrong, please let me know.

Now, the next paragraph really wants to emphasize how much money your old workers' compensation claim could be worth, even if you already got money, or didn't even miss work. Yay hoo.

Next, he tells us that he's only one of two attorneys in Mahoning County who passed the state's specialization test for workers' comp (a specially tested ambulance chaser?). Woot.

In the spirit of the infomercial...But wait, there's more! Local 717 members are going to get a discount on his fee! Instead of paying him a third of anything you get, he's only going to take 20% of your loot! Woo hoo! However, this fee does not cover expenses (costs, medical exams, reports, etc.). You don't have to pay the expenses if he doesn't get you any money. The letter doesn't say what you'll owe him, though.

Ugh. I've got to say that I'm really sick of all of the vultures that have been flying overhead since the buyout was announced. If it's not an ambulance chaser, it's the next, great investment, or perhaps someone has a business idea that will just knock your socks off.

Enough.

If, by chance, you still have any of your buyout money left, go put it away somewhere. Make it last...because you know you won't be seeing money like that (all in one lump, that is) ever again.

Anyone have a slingshot? I think it's time to take aim at some vultures...

Dawn